Until it becomes a habitual, automatic, visceral response - one lived through your body and nervous system - it isn’t integrated.
This is the importance of embodied work.We can read books, go to seminars, hire coaches and see therapists. All of it great. Essential even for transformation. But, until the insights are programmed into our very being - until we generate a new disposition in our behavior (transcending reactivity and showing up in response-ability) - we remain stuck. We can forever delude ourselves that we are taking steps forward, but in reality and at best, we take one step forwards and another backwards as soon as the intensity of the situation topples our awareness and has us resort back to our old habitual patterns.
I know this because for so long I remained (and I admit, still remain in many areas) on this level of conceptualization, hoping deeper or clearer understanding into a situation would bring about the change I longed for.
But, patterns are not changed by simply dissecting them or ‘unwiring’ them. They are changed once we install a new alternative which serves us better - through 'rewiring'. And to do so is the PRACTICE of embodiment: to consciously and consistently decide to show up with a new disposition to selected stimuli.
After some time, we gradually carve out a new path of action (response), one that becomes more and more familiar and automatic, until at some point we realize that the old path is now over-grown, untraversable terrain which is now utterly foreign to our nervous system and modus operandi.
Finding a sustainable embodiment practice that offers a new way of being is vital in enabling this rewiring. For example, to practice martial arts is a fantastic way of conditioning ourselves with a new way of response to challenging or confrontational situation, when perhaps our prior tendency was to react by retreating, becoming small, staying quiet, harmonizing, essentially giving up our power.
The rewiring won't happen without practice. So I invite you to reflect, where do you wish to see transformation? What's the current disposition, and what's the alternative you want to carve out? Once identified, then seek out a practice that will help you install that alternative into your way of being. This second step can be challenging, as there's a lot of nuance in embodiment practices: not all yoga styles develop the same qualities; some martial arts are more 'watery' than others; some dance styles can reinforce rigid behavior patterns, others invite a complete surrender into free-flowing bodily form.
So, reflect and explore! Changing our being has to include an exploration of the body's spectrum of potential.
With love,
Fred
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